Direct BeingSeptember 29, 2013
Attention usually is directed outward, to an object that has to bring nice feelings. This attitude is learned as the right recipe for happiness. Happiness seems to come from outside and to be caused by an object. Object-focused attention is the mechanical attitude of an apparent self, which sees itself as a separate object.
The object to which the yearning is directed may be a thing, an idea, an imagination, a person, a state of being… it's always about the effect that the object must bring. This effect must be a nice feeling of happiness and must take place in time.
When attention relaxes in that which is aware of the yearning, and falls back, as it were, in what is always the timeless ground of all activities, this open Directness turns out to be the same as the happiness to which the yearning was reaching.
The Loving Emptiness
This Openness of Being is the loving Emptiness, which the mind sometimes calls 'nothingness'. This title 'nothing' comes, because mind functions in terms of concepts, words and images. Directness of Self-Being isn't an object or a concept. It cannot be caught in a description or category. Direct Being is befóre - and prior to - time, space and form…
When the search for happiness stops, Wellbeing is experienced. Well-being is always the Directness of Self-Being. It seems gone when attention is fixated on the search for happiness, in resistance to everything that seems not okay now.
Realization of Direct Being dismantles the illusion of 'the insufficient self', which seems to have to come to fulfillment through resistance and fighting. This seemingly being subject to time ends in the recognition of timeless Being.
Longing always is for this Direct Being… the Self that you always already are. Habitually, however, happiness is sought in reaching or getting something. The false self thinks it needs something from outside to become happy and whole. This begins with the believe in a separate self: me.
Fear of not being
The struggle is the outwardly directed search for value and peace. Fighting seems necessary to give the assumed false self a reason. In the realization of Direct Being identification with the separate self stops… ego-activity is protesting, from fear of not being, from fear of death.
Struggling is the I-thought… the illusion fighting against admitting its fictitious nature… apparent separateness, cherishing a concocted past to prove an imagined existence. Through performance it tries to be good enough, have value and be part of an imagined world.
The I-thought disappears when mind drops quiet in deep sleep, or when a desire is fulfilled. In the morning it is evoked again, when mind activity starts up, or - after a fulfillment - right away claims ownership, and proudly states 'I did this'.
Timeless Awareness neither comes nor goes… It is always the 'background' to which mind activity appears. Fear of death evaporates in recognition of this inner Truth that isn't born and doesn't die.
Being is the Truth of one Self with no separate self. Self-Being is the Peace to which the yearning goes out. This Peace is here now, as the one Self-Being in which there's neither inside nor outside.